Dancing with Memory

I remember.

I remember sunlight on the golden hair of my sister as she rode into the stable, where I was mucking stalls.

I remember running through the forest, bow in hand, seeking signs of fresh game.

I remember setting a long table for a meal, with other children, our movements smooth with long practice, the older children directing the younger.  At that time, I was one of the younger.

I remember an inn or tavern to the southwest, two or three days journey.  The food is rich, creamy… somewhere between a soup and a gravy, almost like a pot-pie… heavy with a barley-like grain and other vegetables as well as thick chunks of a venison-like meat, served in a trough formed by partially hollowing a loaf of bread.  It was eaten with carved wooden spoons, small and curved into shapes reminiscent of the shells of the common mussel (Mytilus edulis).  I find myself drawn to food that reminds me of it, still.

I remember dancing with a rippling blade of sky-blue metal, like a mountain lake reflecting a clear sky in summer.  The blade felt warm and alive in my hands as I moved, our motions flowing together with the deep inner Song of the land.  We did not move to some fixed pattern, but in constant relation to the world around us, physical and nonphysical, what is and what may be.  It is a skill I am trying to relearn.

I remember wearing a coat of chain mail armor, with rings as small and fine as a fish’s scales.  Looking out from the breast of the mail is the image of a stag’s head, somehow set in three dimensions within the metal like a hologram.  It seems to face the viewer no matter what angle they view it from, the stag’s eyes almost staring through you.

I remember a boy, wounded and delirious with fever in the rare moments he regained consciousness.  His horse had led me to him, and I remember carefully gathering him up and taking him back home with me, entrusting him to my father and elder sister for medical care.  I remember pacing around, nervous as a new father, waiting for news of his condition.

I remember a narrow stone bridge over a large underground lake or river.  The cavern was immense, and not entirely natural… along with the bridge itself, excavation had been done into it, making branching shafts that honeycombed the walls of the cavern.

I remember these things, and others which are not my story alone to tell.

I remember Alorya.

An Aloryan Glossary

This entry is a catalog of words and phrases which have been remembered by those who remember being elves on a world we refer to as Alorya.  Wherever possible I have credited the person who first remembered the word, and I have done my best to provide pronunciations for most of them and commentary wherever relevant.  It will be updated as more is remembered, and if anyone has any additions, comments or corrections to make to the words or phrases listed here, please let me know.  Especially if I’ve gotten pronunciations or attributions incorrect.

WordPronunciationMeaningCommentaryRemembered By
AcheylaAh-kay-lahAn informal greeting used between friends.A shortened form of a longer greeting; the more formal version is "Harani a'kaheyla de'shanuay".Casteylan
AlanorAl-ah-noora personal name, meaning unknownArhuaine
AloryaAh-lore-yahMeans "Land of Songs"The name for either our world or our nation within that world.Arhuaine
AnadraelAh-nah-dray-elGiven name; meaning Unknown.Anadrael
AndrastaiAhn-drah-styGuards (military)Likely to be related to the Tulari word Adrastai.Casteylan
AravelAh-ra-velPlace name, an island, meaning unknown.Casteylan
Areah-reyGold ColorCasteylan
ArhuaineAr-h-wenGiven name meaning or carrying connotations of "Golden light"Arhuaine
Bian za ri!Bee-ahn-zah-ree"Okay, let's go!" or "Let's rock and roll!"Frey/Eyovah
BrynruddBrinn-ruddRedhillNot entirely sure this is Aloryan, may be a non-elven language.
Upon further research this appears to be Welsh and may have been a placeholder name rather than a remembered term.
CankahnfiveMay also be the word for "hand".Arhuaine
Casteylankas-tey-lanPersonal name, possibly meaning "Red Hawk"Arhuaine
CenanKen-antwenty oneArhuaine
CencanKen-canTwenty five?Alternately, may have been "annog" or "cannog".Arhuaine
CenenKen-entwenty fourArhuaine
CeneshKen-eshtwenty twoArhuaine
CenlishKen-lishtwenty threeArhuaine
CeshaiKesh-eyeGoodbye forever.Used when the speaker does not believe they will be returning, or at a sundering of ties meant to be a permanent parting of ways.Casteylan
CeshanKesh-anelevenI am not sure why this is ceshan rather than eshan or c'eshan. If the root cesh is a negation or a reference to a parting/ending, this would not appear to make much sense, unless there are more subtle nuances of speech that would indicate whether the sound is being used as a number or as something else.Arhuaine
CesharKesh-arRoughly "Until we meet again".A temporary farewell with the implication that we part as friends and will meet again. Possibly related linguistically to the Tulari word "ceshtanen", meaning "erased completely", as they appear to share the root "cesh".Casteylan
CevennaKeh-ven-nahSomething like "soul-twin" or "twin flame".Not entirely sure this is Aloryan.Unknown
CiarenSea-ah-renA city, name meaning unknown.Casteylan
ClarashKlah-rahshA musical instrument resembling a harp, small enough to rest on the knee.Casteylan
Cosainko-sane"The Ways" or "The Paths"A network of stones linked in such a way that moving from one to another was possible, even if the stones were on different worlds or (possibly) different dimensions. Different from standard Gating, however.Arhuaine
Da'laernDah-lay-urn"Elven dreams"?Not entirely sure this is Aloryan.Jarandhel
DorrdoorA type of wild ponyArhuaine
Elel"Of" or "belonging to".Casteylan
El'KarielEl-kare-ee-el"Star Path of Manipulating Stars...with the mental image of a stellar life and death cycle...how the death of some stars ignites the birth of others elsewhere"?  Arhuaine
EndrastaiEn-drah-styRangers (military). Wardens may also be an appropriate translation.Likely to be related to the Tulari word Adrastai.Casteylan
EshiraEsh-ihr-ahBelovedThis is not a term of endearment which should be used lightly, with casual friends or even lovers. I have lovers whom I have been with for years whom I would not be comfortable referring to with this word. It is more appropriate as a term of affection for one's chosen lifemate(s) in my opinion.Casteylan
Gwai-GwhyRoot word meaning skyArhuaine
GwairochGwhy-rochLiterally, "skyhorse". An animal like a pegasus.Arhuaine
HaildarHail-darGiven or Clan Name; meaning UnknownArhuaine
HaranHar-anHonour, respectAlternately may mean bless/blessing.Casteylan
Harani a'kaheyla de'shanuayHar-an-eye ah-kah-hey-la de-shan-oo-ayI am honoured to greet you and walk beside you on your path.Casteglan
Ja nevnayJah Nev-nayAn oath, roughly translating to 'velvet sky', most often used when thoroughly exasperated with someone/thing.Possibly a reference to a common godform among elves in the Elenari language group currently known only as "the star goddess"; no proper name has yet been remembered.Unknown
JarandhelJah-ran-dellGiven name; meaning Unknown.Jarandhel
Key-talKay-talEmphatic no; possibly "no way" or "no way in hell"Frey/Eyovah
LairenLair-enSong or possibly Summer; meaning uncertain.Casteylan
LiesinLee-sin or Lee-eh-sinGiven name or title; meaning Unknown.We may be mispronouncing or misremembering this word due to familiarity with the Celtic name/title "Taliesin".Frey/Eyovah
LlewynLew-enA country, name meaning unknown.Casteylan
Merka-tha lienMer-kah-thah lee-enCalls for reinforcementsFrey/Eyovah
Myhidr???Lover/Companion - this is a term used for only the closest or most beloved ones. It is not quite a soul mate, but close.Unknown
NauwarNow-ahrGiven name; meaning Unknown.Not entirely sure this is Aloryan.Jarandhel
NoinoyDarkness, shadow, absence of light.Does not carry connotations of evil.Casteylan
OniyaOh-nee-yahSongNot entirely sure this is Aloryan.Unknown
RochrokhHorse, or a horse-like riding animalArhuaine
RuachRoo-akhA fermented and spiced berry drink, mildly alcoholic, served warm like mulled wine.Sometimes referred to as "berry beer".Arhuaine
SadretheSah-dree-thaPersonal name, meaning unknownArhuaine
SellaSell-ahOceanNot entirely sure this is Aloryan.Unknown
Shakto -tha lienShak-toe-tha lee-enMake themselves more obvious, step in front. (imperative)Frey/Eyovah
ShenShenForever or InfinityUnknown
Tie-zanTie-zahn"(It shall be) as you command" or "affirmative".Frey/Eyovah
TyrianTeer-ee-anGiven name; meaning Unknown.Duo
VooriVore-ayeWolf or wolvesNot entirely sure this is Aloryan.Unknown
Y'YhPrefix meaning "Land of"Casteylan
Y'FinionYh-Finn-ee-ohnA country; meaning unknown.Casteylan
Y'lairenYh-lair-enMeaning unclearAnother name for Alorya?Casteylan
ZaliZah-lee"See" or "Go to" (imperative)Frey/Eyovah
Zian gararth tul. Nan dianZi-an gar-ath tul. Nan dee-anFirst part unclear.  Nan Dian may mean "it is agreed" or "it shall be done".Not entirely sure this is Aloryan.Frey/Eyovah

Reverse Engineering the Orgone Crystal Matrix

The Orgone Crystal Matrix, popularly known in the Otherkin community as the “Babalon Matrix” or “Reiki Matrix”, has been an obsession of mine for nearly ten years now.  I first encountered the device in June of 1999, at Walking the Thresholds 2.  I had never seen a magical tool like it before, and I very quickly came to the conclusion that I wanted to learn to make a Matrix of my own.  After years of further study in various metaphysical paths, and research into all currently available information about the original Orgone Crystal Matrix design, I believe I have finally accomplished that.

What is the Matrix?

So, what is the Matrix?  At its most basic level, the Orgone Crystal Matrix is a more advanced and somewhat more portable version of a Crystal Grid.  The original Orgone Crystal Matrix was designed by someone going by the name Leon.  The only email address I had originally been given for him was apparently just missing an underscore, but as a result all of my iniitial attempts to track him down and contact him regarding his original design had met with no success.  As such, attempting to reverse engineer his design was my only option.  As of the first comment on this article, that has changed, and I am very glad to now be able to credit him properly.  I am also going through the article to correct some information that I had gotten wrong; I believe I have now corrected all of the initial mistakes including the proper generic name for this type of device.

Physical Design of the Orgone Crystal Matrix

Physically, the core of the original Orgone Crystal Matrix that I encountered was a small tower-like structure made of two PVC floor strainers connected by four 12″ metal shelving tracks.  In the middle of the structure there were two rubber doughnut bumpers measuring 2.25″ in diameter and between 0.5″ and 0.75″ in thickness.  Embedded in the center of each of these bumpers were two rare earth ring magnets.  The bumpers and magnets were suspended from the shelving tracks by springs arranged in a double-helix shape.  Photos of the core may be viewed below:

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The other major physical components of the Orgone Crystal Matrix consisted of four small perimeter units holding 8″ lab-grown quartz crystals.   The crystals were held by loops of what appeared to be plumbing hose  mounted in approximately 2″ lengths of copper pipe bolted to wooden boards.  Photos of these perimeter unites may be viewed below:

Metaphysical Design of the Orgone Crystal Matrix

Of the methods used in the metaphysical construction of the Orgone Crystal Matrix, I was originally able to learn fairly little, though I had been told that Reiki was used in the construction of the device.

I had been told that it involved three days of energywork to charge after its initial construction.  This turned out to be correct, but somewhat misleading.  The initial charging was spread out over three days as the creator found this to be more practical and less stressful than doing it all in one go, but was not a three-day-long marathon of charging.

I have been told that a wash using moldavite bath salts was used to purify and charge some of the pieces prior to the Matrix’s construction.  Moldavite incense was used, and both have been recommended as useful in preparing an area for working with the device.

I have been told that the crystals themselves were harmonized.  This was not the new-age process of tuning crystals that I originally believed it to be, it was much simpler: the creator selected crystals for the Matrix by tapping them lightly against one another to find four that were harmonically resonant.  Unfortunately this is not practical if mail-ordering crystals.

I have been told that the design was influenced by the work of Charles Cosimano, and that the original designer has been in email conversations with “Uncle Chuckie” for years.  This, along with certain properties of the device’s operation, lead me to believe that the Orgone Crystal Matrix is ultimately based on radionics.  This final clue, and my research into the work of Charles Cosimano, was the most important information for reverse engineering the Matrix on an energetic level, and I would like to thank Mark Buckley for pointing me in that direction.

Operating the Orgone Crystal Matrix

In operation, the Orgone Crystal Matrix was set up with the crystal units set at four points around the core.  If the operator wished, these points could be aligned with the compass directions, but this was not actually necessary for the operation of the device.

If it was desired to create a field of amplified energy the crystals were arranged with their larger flat side facing inward, towards the core.  This was primarily used in circumstances where the operator wished to stand within the field of energy and experience it or allow it to affect themselves.  If it was desired that energy be broadcast instead, all that was necessary was to turn the crystals around and face the larger flat side away from the core.

In order to tune the field of energy created, or the energy broadcast, a small object would be placed in the core, held suspended by the rubber doughnut bumpers and magnets assembly.  Usually this object would be a stone, often a polished stone sphere or egg.

Some people believe that spherical focus stones provide for a smoother energy field, and that the suspension of the stone both allows the crystal to vibrate freely and keeps the energy field from being trapped in the core of the device.  I personally cannot confirm these observations, as I have never had any trouble achieving a smooth field with even such material as a energetically-charged chunk of driveway gravel, and my experiments with Matrixes that do not suspend the focus stone have been quite successful.

I have also been told that stones containing Iron should be avoided as the central stone as it creates a “jagged” energy in the Matrix which is unpleasant to work with.  Again, this is not an observation I can confirm as one of my favorite focus stones is “Healer’s Gold”, a combination of magnetite and pyrite which are both minerals containing iron in their chemical makeup, and I have never experienced its energy as jagged or in any way unpleasant.  I suspect it may be a matter of personal taste and affinity for particular chemical elements.

While in operation, the Matrix can be aligned with different “frequencies” by holding the intention of your operation in mind and rotating the core (or the stone in the core depending on your preference, though I have been told rotating the entire core produces more easily chartable/reproducible results) until the energy of the Matrix feels like it has harmonized with your intention.  This is one of the effects that makes me believe the Matrix to be radionic in principle, as similar means of tuning are used in many of Charles Cosimano’s radionic devices.  It was also reported to me that the settings for these frequencies could not be mapped onto a physical chart of dial positions, which suggested to me that it is not physical properties of the focus stone that are being aligned but that the physical process of dialing is, like in radionics, an aid to mentally tuning the device.

Much like the Crystal Grids, the Matrix has many uses, possibly limited only by the imagination of the operator.  It is known to have been used for healing, for intensifying Reiki attunements, for Enochian workings, for charging talismans and sigils, for sex magic, for enhancing the manifestation of otherkin traits, for promoting Awakening and the recovery of otherkin past-life memories, and for gateworking.  Over time, the Matrix tends to attune to the energies used with it most.

To further boost the effect of the Matrix, it can be helpful to provide an additional power source.  The Orgone Crystal Matrix was most frequently operated in conjunction with a small hand-sized Orgone Shooter as that power source, collecting ambient energy and directing it in a stream towards the focus stone in the core.  Photos of the shooter used with the original device may be seen below:

A small krypton or argon light has also been used in place of the Orgone Shooter to enhance the effect of the Matrix.  Other tools, including such traditional tools as wands and staves, may also be used to provide a stream of energy to the core.

Symbols can also be placed below the Matrix, and other stones or charged items placed in the bottom PVC floor strainer, to increase the field or combine energies.

Photos of the full Orgone Crystal Matrix during its operation may be seen below:

The Secret of the Matrix

Ultimately, I found the key to reverse engineering the Matrix in the works of Charles Cosimano.  While they can be a rather odd read, particularly “Psionic Terrorism”, there is a great deal of very useful information contained in his writing and I cannot recommend it too highly.  There I found the idea that what makes Radionic devices work is, in his words “ultimately the relationship between the mind of the operator, the machine and the subject”.  This is what allows even radionic plans drawn on paper or fashioned from cardboard to function as well as more sophisticated models.

Put simply, a radionics device is a physical focus for a thoughtform.  This is an energetic construct shaped or programmed by thoughts and emotions (hence the name) and imbued with energy by its creator.  It is related to the Tibetan concept of the Tulpa.  It is also related to the Western magical concepts of Servitors and Egregores.

Empowering a Matrix

Creating the thoughtform for a Matrix is a lot like creating and empowering a sigil.  I recommend starting by creating a physical form for it… the Matrix structure itself, or at the very least the Matrix core.  This core serves roughly the same function as the physical glyph of a magical sigil; providing the thoughtform with a physical focus to house its energetic form.  Set it up, along with the perimeter crystals (or whatever objects you have used for your perimeter-it is not necessary that they be crystals) facing inward to create a contained field.  When I did this part, I placed the crystals very close to the core and stood outside of them, but that is a matter of individual preference.

From there, I recommend linking up the core and the perimeter crystals much as you would for the creation of a Crystal Grid.  Really visualize the structure of energetic links glowing between the parts of your Matrix, connecting the pieces together and creating the field of energy you desire.  Let the energy build until it is as strong as you can make it, the links between the physical components searing into their essence, binding them together.

Now, while holding these energies in place, focus on the core. Feel its energy, feel its connection to the outer crystals.  Feel the field generated by the Matrix, and notice how the field is originating from and being modulated by the core, the outer crystals providing a boundary for the field.  Affirm to yourself that anything you place in the core will cause the field to attune itself to the energies of that focus object.  Affirm to yourself that you can tune the field simply by rotating the focus object until the field matches your intention, like tuning a radio.  Affirm to yourself that you can cause the device to broadcast energy rather than creating a field of energy simply by turning the perimeter crystals in the opposite direction.  Dwell on all of these things, repreating them over and over in your mind, until they are burned in as fact.  This is how your device operates.  There is no question, it is simply how you know it to be.

Now, building the energy of the device up again as high as you can comfortably maintain it, give your Matrix a name.  It can be anything you like, as long as you can remember it.  Repeat it in your mind, while focusing on the Matrix and the energy flowing through it, until you feel it kind of settle into place, as if it had sunk into the device and become a part of it.  This name will serve as a key, and will help to keep the Matrix charged as well as providing an easy means to access the thoughtform in the future should you wish to give it additional or more advanced programming, or even just to wake the device back up after a period of disuse.

Since this is clearly not three days worth of energywork, I will state my belief that this is the core of the process and that any further preparation likely involved charging it up further, exercises to further solidify the thoughtform used, and aligning/attuning it with various metaphysical systems that the creator worked with.  In my experience all of those can be done over time through working with the device regularly, and it is not necessary to do them all at once at the beginning, though some may find it helpful for their purposes to do so.

And that’s how I create Matrixes.  There are, of course, as many other methods as there are methods of sigilization or creating Servitors.  The point really isn’t which one you choose to use, so much as it is finding one that works well for you.

Mutating the Matrix

So far, I’ve created three main Matrix prototypes.  Each of them have a slightly different design, both physically and energetically.  I’ll briefly go through them and their construction details in the hopes that it will give some small idea of what is possible with regard to Matrixes, in order from my least favorite to my most favorite.

Matrix Prototype – “Elvendreams/Da’Learn”

Physically, this prototype was very simple.  It’s made of two circular pieces of wood connected by seven wooden dowls.  The dowls were glued to the wooden pieces using epoxy.  German silver wire has been looped between the dowels to form a seven pointed star.

It was conceived as an attempt to make the Matrix design more elven, using more organic components.  That is also why it was named after the first Reiki symbol which I channeled, the english name for which is “Elvendreams”.  This concept also influenced it on an energetic level, as I tried to make the thoughtform behave somewhat like a tree.  Instead of requiring an external orgone shooter or similar artificial energy-input device, I tried programming the thoughtform to take in energy from the air around it, the sun, and the earth upon which it was set.  I also programmed it to use its flat upper surface as the area upon which focal items are to be placed.

It functions, and some people do seem to prefer it, but ultimately I have not found this design to be one that I have any great affinity for.

Matrix Prototype – “TechnOneiron”

This Matrix was meant to be my Masterpiece, and as such its design was much more complicated.  I took the donated motherboards of three computers and connected them together using copper tubing into a roughly pyramidal shape.  This was not easily done, and I had to significantly bend most of the copper tubing to accomplish it, though it remains capable of supporting some degree of weight, including a wholly independent copper wire-frame pyramid at the topmost level.  I placed an orgone shooter in the bottom section.  I was out of project boxes, so the guts of this particular shooter are simply wrapped in tape to hold it together).  Finally, I used twisted german silver wire to create a stand for a dvd, placed purple data-side out, which I intended to function dually as either a scrying mirror or a projector.

Energetically, I went a bit more traditional with this design.  The only really different aspects were the scrying/projecting function that I intended the DVD to have, the fact that I wanted the uppermost tier to be able to serve like the witness plate in a radionics device, and the fact that I wanted the lower two levels to influence the focus, somewhat like a multi-tiered altar, though there would still be one central focus point located in the center of the middle level.

Again, it does work, and I do connect to this one somewhat better than to the Da’Laern model.  But ultimately I have not been satisfied with it.  Perhaps it is the misshapen physical construction, or perhaps my ideas for it were somewhat too unfocused for creating a strong thoughtform, but I do not have nearly the affinity for it that I do for my remaining prototype  Ironic since TechnOneiron was the last Matrix prototype I created, and that was the first.

Matrix Prototype – “Promise”

Physically, “Promise” is the best looking of my Matrixes.  The core is a candleholder with the glass panes removed.  I used german silver wire to suspend an orgone shooter from the frame of the candleholder, with additional silver wire at the top helping to hold the shooter in alignment with the center of the area a candle would normally rest in.  As with all of my designs, the perimeter crystals are simply being held in small plastic “easel” frame holders, which hold them in the proper alignment and allow free and easy rearrangement, as well as folding flat for storage or transportation.

Energetically, there are precisely two things which differentiate Promise from a standard Matrix.  First, I programmed it so that energy from the orgone shooter will pass down through the focal point, picking up its charge, then proceed down to the spherical metal ball underneath the candleholder where it will be radiated out in all directions forming the field.  So far, I very much like the effect caused by this alternation.  It feels more like the device “owns” the field, rather than the focus stone being treated as the true core of the device.  This relegates the focus stone back to a role more akin to a filter, attuning the energy of the field but not the field’s point of origin.

Second, this is the only one of my Matrixes for which I have made an energetic modification to the original thoughtform.  The modification was to allow the silver wire to pick up energy, particularly energies associated with the stars and other extra-terrestrial sources, as though they were an antenna receiving radio waves and focus that energy into the Orgone Shooter.  This modification has settled in splendidly, and Promise is certainly the best of my Matrix prototypes.

I knew from the moment I put it together that it looked promising. 😉

Where do we go from here?

Obviously, these are just some of the things that can be done to modify Matrixes.  There are many others, both physical and energetic.  At the time of this writing, I have already created a staff that can create a field similar to a Matrix, though it does take a bit more conscious effort to maintain without the use of boundary crystals or similar perimeter markers.  I also have a ring that, when a focus stone is set atop it, functions as a broadcast Matrix without the need for perimeter stones.  I have been experimenting further by placing this ring, with a focus stone atop it, in the Promise Matrix to combine the effects.  I have been quite pleased with the results.

In theory, it is possible that one can duplicate all of the effects of a Matrix using nothing but a paper drawing to house the thoughtform.  It is even theoretically possible to have the thoughtform exist without any corresponding physical focus.  Like an egregore, it could just have a name and perhaps a sigil.  I believe it would be difficult to sustain a complex thoughtform such as the Matrix without a physical focus, but with sufficient practice it is well within established occult tradition.

Beyond that, who knows?  I’d love to hear other people’s ideas, either in the comments below or through private email.